Confession No. 25: I Thought I Was The Main Character

I love watching movies. There is just something about getting caught up in someone else's story for two hours that keeps me coming back for more. The really great movies allow us to feel the main character's story unfolding along side of them. We feel their joy or pain and this often reminds us of our own lives.

Isn't that what the Bible is? It is God's story. As each chapter unfolds, we learn something new about God. As we read through the individual stories of Adam, Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Joshua, Job, etc., we start to see how each of them plays a small role in God's grand picture. The problem in my own life is that I thought my story was about me. The truth is, my story is just a tiny portion of God's story. His story plays out through eternity and we have the opportunity to be a part of His brilliant production.

When Joshua was about to go into war against the Canaanites for the Promise Land, he was feeling the burden of being God's chosen leader. As he stood just outside of Jericho feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders, he learns that he is not the main character in this story either.

Joshua 5:13-15
13 When Joshua was near the town of Jericho, he looked up and saw a man standing in front of him with sword in hand. Joshua went up to him and demanded, “Are you friend or foe?” 14 “Neither one,” he replied. “I am the commander of the Lord’s army.” At this, Joshua fell with his face to the ground in reverence. “I am at your command,” Joshua said.
“What do you want your servant to do?” 15 The commander of the Lord’s army replied, “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy.” And Joshua did as he was told.

Joshua learns that this story is not about his leadership or about the Israelites getting the Promise Land. This story is about God. It was not Joshua's battle. The battle was the Lord's and Joshua was just playing out the role that God had called him to. I hope that I can respond like Joshua did. When he realized that this was the Lord's battle and not his own... when he realized that he was standing in the presence of the holy one, He asks, "What do you want your servant to do?"

Have you realized that your life is holy ground? Submit the details to God knowing that it's not about you. God cannot lose, so if you feel like you are in a battle right now, just know that you are not fighting it alone. God will fight for you... In His story, He gets all of the victory, but as His children, we are so blessed that He allows us to have a speaking role. Moses may have said it best in the book of Exodus, "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

My prayer: Thank you Jesus for allowing me to be a part of your story. Please continue to remind me that it is not about me. Amen.

Confession No. 24: I'm Jumping In

God's been taking me back to the basics in life. In our digital fast-paced world, life can get chaotic and overwhelming. Lately, I've been feeling like I've gained the entire world and still have nothing to show for it. I'm learning that Jesus is my prize. He is the only one that can satisfy, so I've been allowing him to prune and cut away at the things in my life that rob me of more of him. The process is painful to say the least. I have such huge goals, vision, and dreams for my tomorrows, but in my day to day walk, I often feel paralyzed. Because of this, I've felt God's call to just put one foot in front of the other and jump in to the plans that He has for me. He's calling me out to Himself on the water asking me to trust him. Sometimes I worry that I'll sink and other times I worry that I'll just be one huge belly flop for the world to laugh and point at.

How about you? Is God calling you to make changes in your life? Do you have a dream that seems impossible? If so, I'd like to encourage you to give it to God. Take the leap of faith and know that He will catch you. He has amazing plans for your life!

Confession No. 23: I Was Headed To The Promise Land

Saturday our car wouldn't start. Now I know that people's cars break down all the time. The problem with this time is that I was supposed to be headed on my summer road trip to the beach. Awwe... the glorious beach. The one place that had been promising me relaxation and joy all summer. My promise land. I'd looked forward to it for weeks and was totally bummed that my plans had been ruined with the simple turn of a key. Funny thing is... God was trying to show me where my heart really was.

I've been taking my time in reading through my Bible each night. I've spent years rushing through my Bible time just to check it off of my list as done, but in my new efforts, I sometimes only get through a few sentences so that I can allow God to speak to me. So far, I'm just about done with the book of Exodus. I'm sure you've heard about the Israelites. Descendants of Abraham, Isaac, & Jacob. The Israelites were slaves to the Egyptians before God set them free and lead them on a journey to The Promise Land. The land flowing with milk and honey. I guess that means they had lots of cows and bees in this land, but for some reason that was a really great thing to them. ;) ok. Back to the story... God did so many amazing things for the Israelites in setting them free from slavery. They had complained through it all, but still He came through for them EVERY SINGLE TIME. Even after all of God's miraculous signs, the Israelites would go back to their complaining. I can remember how frustrated I felt reading the story. Why couldn't they just trust God? How could they complain after all He'd done for them? How could God even tolerate them?

I don't know the answer to those questions, but on Saturday night, after I looked back on what should have been a glorious day at the beach, the Lord nudged me...

"Hey Annie, remember all the complaining and griping you did today? Do you
remember still being grumpy instead of thanking me for getting your
car fixed the same day at 1/6 of the price that it should have cost? Do you remember getting mad at your husband for doing His best to get everything taken care of?"

Me: "Yes Lord, I remember."

My Prayer:
Father, thank you for tolerating my disgusting selfishness and
ungratefulness. Save me from myself. I want to love and please you for who you are and not just for what you can do for me. Show me how to trust you. You always come through for me and I know that you are the only thing I can count on in life. Thank you for the lessons you are teaching me through your word. Your love and grace overwhelm me. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Confession No. 22: The System Failed Me

Just in case you were wondering how my Bible study "system" has been working out... I'm excited to tell you that it's been sweeter than ever... with a little tweaking from God.

For the first time in my life I'm realizing that God cannot be confined to my desire to organize and systemize every detail of my life. I started my last Bible study system in April with so much enthusiasm and excitement about digging into God's word. Unfortunately, the zeal only lasted a few days before I faded... As usual. BUT GOD (one of the most powerful phrases in the Bible) but God kept nudging me to keep pressing on in His word. So, one night while lying in Bed, I opened up the Bible in my iPhone and just started reading at the very beginning. No plan. No system. No lights. Just me and God's word... And the Holy Spirit of course. This has turned out to be my favorite part each day. Before I go to bed I just keep reading from where I left off. God has used this time to reveal so much about himself to me and it has been so refreshing. It's sad to say, but this is one of the first things I've done in life without trying to analyze and preplan every detail. I guess that's what Happens when we just let God do his thing. I'm ealizing that he doesn't need me to try and controll it all. Turns out He's got it covered.

My prayer:
Thank you Jesus for not allowing me to get caught up in the way I think things should be. Thank you for still revealing your glory to me even when my heart and actions stinch of sin. Thank you for giving your son, so that I could start over. Your Words are life to me. I love you.

Confession No. 21: I Need a System For Learning More About God

I am not what you would consider an "organized / systems kind of girl", but I desperately want to be. I long for the day, when I can make a schedule and stick to it or create a to-do list and knock everything off of that list within the same day. I have found that I often accomplish more in my life when I take the time to lay it down before the Lord and allow Him to guide my steps. Because of this, I've decided that I MUST carve out (demand, make room for, insist on) alone time with God daily. I want to make sure that I am creating every possible opportunity to hear God's gentle whispers to my heart. I'm looking forward to cutting out things in my life in order to make room for THE only thing in my life that can quiet the raging noises of this world. I've committed my life to knowing and serving Him, yet I've done such a poor job of making room for my King.

My New Bible Study System:

OK, so the first thing that I feel God is calling me to is a more systematic and committed approach to learning about Him. My current Bible study time is random in frequency and content. I listen to new sermon podcasts a few days a week, go to a weekly Bible study on Sunday nights, read 2-3 daily e-mail devotionals, and lately in the evenings I've been reading through the daily readings of the Bible on YouVersion for my iPhone. For all of the effort that I'm putting in, I don't feel to be making much progress. The good side of all of this is that God often speaks to me through my study. The bad side is that I never dig deep enough into any certain area of the Bible to experience significant spiritual growth. I've read through or at least listened to most of the Bible in the past, but all knowledge gained was only surface level. Since realizing this, I requested help from some of my friends on Twitter and here are some of the great comments that I received:

• kristyneyland@empowered How bout the reading plans@ www.biblegateway.com under "Resources". I'm a random reader2. Its something new everyday =) haha
• jthom18@empowered I'm not an evangelical,but this is a great book nonetheless: http://is.gd/szXu. I recommend it to many of my evangelical friends.
• melonymckaye@empowered here's a great site to help www.bibleplan.org
• lilenrgzrbunny@empowered start at the beginning and do one book at a time, or do a read through the bible in a year program.
• mom2giqm@empowered I usually pick a book or a section of the Bible and read thru it, not all in one sitting, but read each book like a book.
• BarbPruitt@empowered try doing a study like on a topic or character or a book study.. makes it more interesting...
• truedaughters@empowered 4 the 1st time I'm doing The One Year Bible published by Tyndale, many transl to choose from, old, new, psalm & prov. each day
• HeartforHim@empowered I use a read through the Bible in a year Bible that has passages from the OT, NT, Psalms, and Proverbs.
• blogomama@empowered Not very systematic but if there's an issue I'm struggling with God seems to turn me to just the right page.

Wow! So much great advice and definitely enough to give me the inspiration to get going. With all of this in mind, I've decided that a great start for me is to study books of the Bible. I've purchased The Bible for Blockheads from Wal-mart to give me a little bit of background information on each book. (such as info about the author, the time period, an overview of the main topics, etc.) I'll read through this before I start each new book. I'll also be sure to listen to podcast sermons that relate to the book I'm reading... a great way to get more insight into what God may be trying to show me. One of the biggest changes that I'll be making is being sure to take time to meditate on, soak in, and apply what I'm learning. Rather than just reading through my Bible, I will allow my Bible to read me. (allowing God to show me what changes I need to make in my life as a result of His Word). I'm super excited about this. Only God knows the changes that are about to occur inside of me.

I'll be starting with the book of John. Want to join me? E-mail me at anna@empoweredmagazine.com!

Confession No. 20: I Heart Romance Movies

In honor of Valentines Day, my Twitter friends and I created a list of our fave romance movies. There's no better day to hit up your local Blockbuster and grab a bag of popcorn for an all out movie love fest!

1. Wedding Singer


2. When Harry Met Sally


3. The Notebook


4. How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days


5. You've Got Mail (Gotta Love Meg & Tom Together)


6. Sleepless In Seattle (Gotta Love Meg & Tom Together)
   
7. Definitely Maybe
   
8. Never Been Kissed


9. Two Weeks Notice


10. Emma


11. Ever After


12. Pride & Prejudice


13. Princess Bride


14. A Walk To Remember


15. Elizabeth Town


16. Titanic


17. Thirteen Going on Thirty


18. Hope Floats


19. Sense & Sensibility


20. Sweet Home Alabama


21. Music & Lyrics


22. Just Friends


23. Breakfast At Tiffany's


24. Shallow Hal


25. Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind


26. Singing In The Rain


27. What Women Want


28. Pretty Woman


29. Shakespeare In Love


30. While You Were Sleeping


31. Ghost


32. Mr. & Mrs. Smith


33. Singing In The Rain


34. The Way We Were


35. The Sound of Music


36. Dirty Dancing


37. Pretty In Pink


38. Beauty & The Beast


39. Anastasia
    
40. Family Man

There is no way we could make a list like this and leave out The Passion. There is no greater love than the love that God has poured out on His people. There is no one else who will ever love you more lavishly or more completely than Jesus. He knows and loves absolutely everything about your complex personality. Your mistakes do not surprise Him and your sincerest efforts could never possibly repay Him, but through His sacrifice, you have been perfected. When He sees you, He sees pieces of Himself. He made you an original, one-of-a-kind, work of art. He calls you His masterpiece and He deeply relishes in your beauty. He sees beyond your potential, past all of your pitfalls and into the deepest desires of your heart. He earnestly longs to be all you’ll ever need or want. He wants more than your heart! He wants ALL of your attention. All of your passion. He wants all of YOU!

...So, did we miss any movies that you think should be added to the list? What's your favorite? Leave your comments to help this list continue to grow.

If you liked this list, follow me on Twitter @ www.twitter.com/empowered

Confession No. 19: The Battle Is On

Did you know that there is a spiritual battle going on right now for your soul? God has already won the war through Christ’s shed blood, but the enemy spends his time trying to convince us otherwise.

Today is day 17 of the new healthier me. Almost three weeks ago I set out on a journey to set boundaries in my life related to my personal health and eating habits. I’ve been feeling God nudging me to make these changes for a while now, but I always seemed to have an excuse as to why I needed to put it off. Anyway, the changes that have occurred over the past few weeks have been phenomenal! I’ll be sharing them over the next couple of weeks with you, but for today, I just wanted to let you know that I’m learning that God did not give us the law just to judge us by it, but to give us a clear picture on how to live in a way that honors and glorifies Him. Jesus said that He did not come to judge the world, but to save it. As I experience His saving power, I’m also becoming more aware of the battle that is going on within myself as well as in the spiritual realm. Everyday I struggle with the choices that I know the Lord is calling me to. I feel the enemy luring me to my old destructive habits and I ask myself, “How can I stay in the fight?” The Bible gives us a simple answer in Ephesians 6:10-20…

10 A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. 12 For we[c] are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. 14 Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. 15 For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.[d] 16 In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil.[e] 17 Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18 Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.[f] 19 And pray for me, too. Ask God to give me the right words so I can boldly explain God’s mysterious plan that the Good News is for Jews and Gentiles alike.[g] 20 I am in chains now, still preaching this message as God’s ambassador. So pray that I will keep on speaking boldly for him, as I should.

Confession No. 17: I Wanted To Hear From God

How do you hear from God? I spent much of 2008 wanting to hear more from Him. One of the deepest cries of my heart is that I would have a real life relationship with my father. I tried everything last year, until I finally realized that He has already given us a glimpse into His world through Christ. Jesus is the living word of God and as we read the Bible we can still hear God speaking to us today. “When you received the word of God…from us, you welcomed it not as the word of men, but as it is…the word of God” (1Th 2:13 NKJV)

When I started looking at the Bible as actual words from God to His people, the text took on entirely new meanings. We have clear instructions on how to live, love, and serve our King. Through His word we can hear His gentle whispers to our souls.The next time you open up the word, don't just read it, but allow it to read you.

Allow God to speak to you and He will transform you from the inside out. That's what happens in relationships. The more time we spend with people, the more and more we start to look and act like them. Remeber that the Bible is the stethascope that allows us to hear God's heart, so grab a cup of coffee and pull up a chair, because He has some clear-cut instructions that He wants to share with you.

Confession No. 16: I'm Dealing With Perfection Infection

Perfection, like pride, can destroy our sincerest efforts to please the heart of God. Before a job interview my mom once told me that I needed to do something unique to help myself stand out over the 11 other applicants... Thus started my addiction to over-complicating, overworking, over thinking, out-performing, don't stop till you can't go anymore life. The night before the interview, I worked till the sun came up. I had created a brilliant presentation and had the job less than a week later. It was great advice, but it has hindered me in so many ways since then.

It sometimes feels like everything that I do now has to be over the top. The really horrible side to this is that I am often slow to make progress. A lot of my good ideas never get launched (because I'm waiting for them to be great) and my relationship with God often seems performance based rather than based on HIS grace. My confession for today is that I want to be healed from my Perfection Infection. I want to be more satisfied with God than I want to be perfect. I want to remember that HE doesn't love me because of how much I do for Him. I want to rest in His presence knowing that He loves me as much on my worst day as He does on my best day. I want to be satisfied with Him alone. I want to live a life that truly says I believe that "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him."

Confession No. 15: I Was Living In The Fast Lane

In our chaotic and fast paced world, people usually think that faster is better. Shorter lines, quicker commutes, and fast food is often a necessity for busy families...

but what happens when our shortcuts cause us to miss out on what God wants to say to us? Rather than spending time allowing God's word to penetrate our spirits to create lasting change and a pure heart for Him alone, we settle for short inspirational quotes on His promises. Oh His promises! (sigh) We love to memorize them and pull them up when life gets us down. The only problem with this is we tend to leave out everything that comes before and after the promises.

Here is an example: Jeremiah 29:11-13

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

For years I stopped right after the part that says God has plans on giving me a hope and a future. In doing this, I was totally missing the part that tells me I need to seek Him with all of my heart. Our life with God cannot be lived in the fast lane. Living a life that pleases Him takes time. Time spent with Him and in His word. If you've been living your life in the fast lane too, pull over to the side of the road. It's not too late to evaluate where your life is headed and get back on track. Your father does have amazing plans for you, but you'll need to slow down enough to let him tell you about them.

Confession No. 18: I'm Praying With My Eyes Open

Have you ever wondered what God looks like? If the Earth is his footstool (Matthew 5:35) and he created millions of galaxies, then I'm positive that we don't have the mental capacity to imagine how huge He is. In my effort to reignite my prayer life, I once asked a few people who I know and trust the following questions: "What do you imagine when you pray?" What does God look like when you close your eyes to talk to Him?"

I thought that if I could just picture Him, then surely I would be able to communicate with Him better. Some of the responses worked for a while, but I still struggled with lack of focus and drifting thoughts during my time with Him. My problem was that I didn't realize that God is really really real. He is always with us. He is not something that we just dream up and trying to create a mental image of God is almost like the Israelites creating a golden calf to worship. (No one has ever seen God. But the unique One, who is himself God,[a] is near to the Father’s heart. He has revealed God to us. John 1:18)

God is bigger than our hearts can contain and we must continually pursue more of Him in our lives, but making up some imaginary image of Him is not the answer to this. We must trust that God has revealed himself through His son. If you want to see God, then study Jesus. God lives within us and is omnipresent (present in all places at all times )... So my confession today is that I'm no longer praying with my eyes closed. God still lives and he is as close as your next breath. You are never alone. He is with you everywhere - every minute of everyday. Take time to acknowledge Him and start praying with your eyes wide open - He is here and He hears you.

Confession No. 14: Learning To Call Him Father

I've known God as savior, master, and friend, but recently He's been teaching me to recognize Him as Father. A few times in the Bible He is referred to as Abba Father. Some language experts believe that the word Abba relates to how an infant would respond to their father - Not necessarily as "Daddy", but as Da-da. What a beautiful picture that paints for us. It's at this young age when we are closest to our parents. It's at this young age when we must depend on them for absolutely everything. I believe that our Father is calling us to a life that is 100% dependent on him. Will you allow Him to carry you in His arms again? Will you trust Him like a child? Will you let go of this world and let Him protect and nurture you?

As I've thought on these things over the last few days, God placed these videos in my path and they ministered to my heart on so many levels. I hope they do the same for you. I'd love to hear comments about your Father/daughter relationship with God.


http://fathersloveletter.com/index.html



Beth Moore - A Parable About the King

Confession No. 13: I didn’t Answer The Call

With talks about financial crisis, political disarray, and war threats on every side, it’s no wonder the average American struggles with so much stress. It’s hard enough that we each have our own personal problems, but to have to think about the country’s problems as well can feel overwhelming.

A few weeks back, I felt God calling me to pray for our country and its leaders. I’ve never been one to do so, so my immediate response was to ignore the call by rationalizing with myself. How could my simple ignorant prayers ever make a difference? I don’t know the first thing about economics, politics, or war. I decided that someone more knowledgeable in those areas could worry about those things. Unfortunately, God didn’t let me off the hook that easily. As the current events become more dramatic, He’s intensified the burden on my heart to pray diligently. With the chaos that’s been going on all around us, it’s obvious that we are all clueless about how the country should be handled. Neither of the political parties have an answer to our imminent problems and the media’s ploy to increase ratings and revenues leaves us with an even more skewed and fearful view of the days ahead.

So how can we make a difference?

First and foremost, God is calling us to keep our eyes on Him. Don’t be moved by what’s going on around you. The market and gas prices may go up and down, but God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He holds us in the palm of His hand and even though everything around us may be falling apart He still reigns. He created the Universe and knows every detail of it’s past and future.

Secondly, we need to do something! We can’t just point fingers. Everyone loves to blame the president or the Republican’s or the Democrats, but the truth of the matter is that we are where we are today because we have failed as a church to be God’s people. We have all waited for someone else to pray or take action, but action must start within ourselves. In 2 Chronicles 7:14 God tells Solomon, “if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.” God didn’t tell him that he would heal their land if they elected the right officials or if they came up with the perfect economic bailout plan. God also didn’t leave it up to Solomon’s actions and prayers to heal the land. God gave the people three tasks

1. humble themselves
2. pray and seek his face
3. turn from their wicked ways

If we want God to restore our land, we must be willing to do each one of those tasks. We need to stop blaming others, humble ourselves through confession of sin in our own lives. Seek God’s face for grace, mercy, and wisdom not only for our own lives, but also for our country and for our elected officials. We need to ask God to reveal our wickedness to us so that we may repent and make changes. He is calling us to serve Him through diligent prayer and worship. He has always promised to take care of the details. Jesus said that His yoke was easy and His burden was light. He wants all of you: your faith, your time, and your adoration, but He will never give us more than we can handle. Be faithful with the three tasks above and leave the rest to Him. He wants to heal our land, but we must give Him room to rule and reign in our own lives first. The Lord is calling you. Will you answer?

Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land. -2 Chronicles 7:14 (NLT)

Confession No. 12: I Was Storing Junk

I recently learned that the first rule of getting organized is to Purge! Purge! Purge! “Get rid of everything that you don’t absolutely want or need,” experts say. In my sincere effort to “start over” in life, I started on a mission this morning to clean out the unnecessary. It’s not like my closet was a complete wreck, but it was full of boxes and bins of “stuff” and to be honest, I could use the extra space. Now, you might be wondering what “stuff” was in those boxes and bins, but the truth is that I couldn’t of told you about 5 hours ago. I’ve been lugging them around for the past 6 years from house to house… did I mention that I’ve moved three times in the last 6 years? It’s been that weird time in my life where I’m just trying to figure out where GOD wants me. Each time I pack up my boxes and move everything with me, never taking the time to figure out if I still need all of that “stuff.” The sad thing is that with each move I have more and more “stuff” to take with me.

Today, as I sorted through my boxes, I started to realize how much of it was actually junk. Junk that I no longer value or need… junk that was taking up precious space that I could be using on things that I now love. With all of my junk unpacked and spread out over the room, I started to think about my life. How many things am I still holding on to that are just taking up valuable space for what GOD wants to do in me? I’m not sure yet, but I’m thinking that it may involve a few time wasters, past commitments I’ve made that may have run their course, and maybe even a few unproductive relationships. Tonight I’ll lay them each down before the Lord as I ask Him to examine my heart to help me get rid of the junk.

How about you? Is there anything that GOD may be asking you to let go of? He has so many amazing things for you and I wonder if you’ll need to let go of a few things to make some room for HIS plans.

Confession No. 11: My Pursuit Was Half-Hearted

What are you pursuing in your life right now? Is it the American Dream of wealth and prosperity? The historian and writer James Truslow Adams coined the phrase "American Dream" in his 1931 book The Epic of America. His analysis perfectly expresses what we strive for from day to day. I wish that I could call myself the exception, but my confession today echoes the lives of millions of Americans. We work our tails off for our homes, cars, financial security, and personal achievements. We sacrifice time with our creator, family, and friends, to get ahead… to achieve The American Dream.

In a seminar that I attended a few months back, I was asked to list out my values and describe what was most important in my life. Then I was asked to outline my schedule to see if my daily activities reflected those values. I was completely shocked to find that the one thing that matters most to me (my relationship with God) was the area of my life that I was devoting the least amount of time to. My heart was saying that I loved Jesus above all else, but my actions were saying that I loved money, security, and my own personal achievements. My actions were far from that of an heiress to the throne of The Almighty. Instead of diligently pursuing the King for myself, I’ve settled for the scraps that are hand fed to me by my favorite Christian books, music, and sermons. I’ve traded true intimacy and fellowship with Him for the comfort of His promises.

In the book of Luke, one of the teachers in religious law asks Jesus how he can inherit eternal life. Jesus responds with a simple answer. “…You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength. The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. No other commandment is greater than these.” -Mark 12:30-31

What a challenge GOD has called us to. Since childhood, I’ve been taught to work hard and do my best so that I can achieve success. I’ve spent years building my business, pursuing excellence, and trying to leave a legacy for those that will come up behind me. The only problem is that all of these pursuits have been in vain. They sound good on the surface and they may even exemplify the American Dream, but the truth is that they have caused me to sacrifice what truly is important to me. I’ve got a lot of serious reflecting to do from here. What does it look like to love GOD with ALL of our heart, soul, and mind? Will you join me on this journey? What changes will we need to make? What things must we stop doing and what things must we begin?

Confession No. 10: I Can't Be The Bunny

Remember the Energizer Bunny? She just kept going and going and going. I can relate to her in so many ways (and not just because she can stylishly pull off an all pink wardrobe either). The last few weeks have been especially fast paced for me. Trying to be everything to everyone as well as the girl who positionally lives out her dreams has lead to a lifestyle that I'm not sure I can keep up with. As I watched the sunrise outside of my office window (after pulling another all nighter), I asked myself "Is this the life that Christ has called me to?" From all of my efforts to be a customer focused entrepreneur, the perfect June Clever wife, the zealous Monica Geller-Bing friend, and the Oprah wannabe Encourager; it just seems like something is missing. It seems like I've neglected my most important role of all. As a daughter of the king... hmmm... Princess (if you will allow me to indulge myself for the purpose of making my point). As GOD's princess, my most important role should be to spend time with my King. Absolutely everything else in life should be secondary. I've not only allowed others to steal this precious time away from me, but I've practically been giving it away. In my chaos, GOD has spoken a word to my heart... "but only one thing is needed." (Luke 10:42) In the story of Martha and Mary, Jesus stops by their house for dinner and Mary chooses to sit at his feet and bask in his presence while Martha is frantically trying to make everything perfect for their guest. I can totally understand where Martha's coming from. When the creator of the Universe is sitting in your living room, paper plates and a frozen dinner just won't work. The surprising twist to the story comes when Jesus tells Martha, "but only one thing is needed. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Just one thing! I've been doing a million good things lately, but I've neglected THE ONE that Jesus has called me to. If you are like me and my pink bunny friend and you've been going and going and going... trying to make things perfect... trying to be it all to everyone... trying to be the perfect hostess to The Creator of The Universe... I hope that you'll take time to answer Jesus' call. He's still there waiting. Waiting for us to take off our aprons and put everything else in life on hold to sit at his feet... daily. This is the one thing that truly matters in life. This is what pleases the king. Don't let anyone or anything steal this time away from you.

Confession No. 9: I Can Only Imagine...

The I Can Only Imagine Mercy Me song has been out for years. When I heard it today, it reminded me of the tears that filled my eyes the first time it's lyrics touched my heart. The song offers such a powerful reminder that one day we will meet Jesus face to face. We'll finally be able to embrace the one that comforted us, loved us, and died for us even while we were at our worst. We'll be able to touch the hands that created ours and actually hear the voice that guided us from within. What an amazing moment that will be. I don't know what I will do when we finally meet, but My confession today is nothing more than some deep internal dialogue. Why don't I feel moved any longer when I imagine meeting my king? How did my heart get so hard? and more importantly how can I regain the enthusiasm, zeal, and passion that I once had for him? How can I let go of this world and cling to the only one that gives me any real reason to live? How can I grab hold of the vision that my life here is so temporary and that He has created a home for me to fellowship with him for eternity? How can I daily remind myself that I was created to serve him, not the other way around?

My heart wants to want Him more! More than I want peace, security, and to be loved and approved by those around me, I want to be desperate for His presence again. I want to long to hear His voice again. I want to get lost in His overwhelming glory.

For today, I know I won't find my answer in a song, program, or Christian book. Only Jesus can answer my questions and only Jesus has the power to breath spiritual life back into my suffocating lungs. I can only imagine where we'll go from here.

Confession No. 8: I Was a Superhero Sidekick

What a day! I went to the beach with some family and friends and was able to spend a few hours with 7-year old Jaime. Jaime is an expert in all things superhero. Primarily Batman and Spiderman, but his character of the day was someone called Sub-zero. As we fought evil one wave at a time, I decided that I was going to need an official superhero name as well as special powers. I finally settled on The Encourager. (Jaime asked if my character was related somehow to The Incredible Hulk.) I told him that my special power involved being able to kill with kindness. He looked a little confused, but was happy to play along.

Jaime... I mean, Sub-zero decided that I could be his sidekick. The only problem was that after coming up with a great name like The Encourager... it just felt like I should play a bigger role than "sidekick." After several minutes of negotiations, it was evident that he was not going budge on his decision. After all, it was his game. He created it and if I wanted to keep playing, I was going to need to play by his rules.

Before the day was over, I wondered if I'd been trying to steal the spotlight from GOD the same way that I was trying to do with Sub-zero. God created me to love and serve him, yet somehow I started to think that this life was all about me and my great ideas and accomplishments. I tried to make myself the Hero rather than the sidekick and in doing so, I lost site of what it was all about.

...so today, it is with great honor that I am resuming my role as a loyal sidekick to my Hero! Will you join me? There are still many battles ahead of us and we need you on our team!

2 Corinthians 10:17-18
But, "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord." For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.

Galatians 6:14
As for me, may I never boast about anything except the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of that cross, my interest in this world has been crucified, and the world’s interest in me has also died.

Confession No. 7: I Was a Party Girl

I've spent at least half of my life as a party girl... pity party girl that is. I hate the sound of that and I hate admitting it, but the truth is that when things got tough in my life, I got depressed. Ugly, crying, snotty, depressed! The devil knocked on my door, asked if he could help me relive my pain, and I would invite him right in every time.

There are so many times in life when we feel like we deserve to cry and be angry... maybe someone betrayed you or you were treated unfairly. Whatever the situation was (or is), you have got to remember that God is still in control. The Bible tells us that God works ALL things (good and bad situations) together for our good. So if you believe that, then you need to continually ask yourself... Do I believe that God does what He says He will do? Do I believe that He has a plan for my life? The answer to both of those questions is always YES!

If you've thrown a few pity parties of your own, remember that before you were born, God created a plan for your life. You were created to serve HIM! So, wipe away the tears. Stop thinking about everything that's going wrong in your life and start thinking about how you can make the most out of the life that you've been given. When you can learn to delight yourself in the Lord, He promises to give you the desires of your heart. –Psalm 37:4

Confession No. 6: I Had Stipulations

Does your faith in God involve stipulations? I'd be embarrassed to admit to anything like that, but as I examined my own heart after God brought this to my attention, I was ashamed to say that I had to think long and hard about my answer.

As you know by now, Abraham had waited on God many many years before the promise of a child with Sarah was fulfilled. I'm almost positive that every time he looked at his son he was reminded of God's faithfulness. I wonder what went through his head when God told him to sacrifice the very promise that he had waited so long for.

At one point in time or another, we'll all face something like Abraham did and what we need to ask ourselves is... "Do we love the promise more then we love the one who made the promise to us?" Can we get so caught up in the promises of God and forget that we are here for Him, and not the other way around.

I've spent the last 10 years waiting on God to show me my purpose in life, but one day I came to a place where I had to ask myself... "What if I was just created to know and love God?... no glitz. no glamour. no glory!" Is he enough for me? If he asked me to give up everything, could I still be satisfied with Him alone? Would I be like Abraham and be willing to lay it all down or would I be like Judas who sold out for a few bucks?

Is God asking you the same question today? If He never gave you the job of your dreams, the perfect family, healing, money, or ministry... would you stick around? Would you still worship Him? Does your faith in God involve stipulations?We would love to hear your thoughts!